Shaped by Pain

We usually remember moments when our emotions have been running high. These could be positive and happy moments, or sad and painful ones; but most of our past memories will consist of a mixture of these. This makes sense because, for most people, it is not every day that we get to have such powerful emotions, so they stick with us when we do, as a stand-out moment.

These experiences can also have an impact on us, changing and shaping who we are and who we will subsequently become. This, again, can be for better or worse, however only some types of experiences are able to hit us hard enough to have an impact on who we are. I think that these experiences, unfortunately, are the most painful ones. Painful enough to change our view on the world, or direction we are heading in life.

I think this because, fortunately, my life has had more happy moments than painful, so I have become more accustomed to a more positive lifestyle. Therefore when painful moments hit, they can serve as a hit on the head. They make me stop and think for a moment, and perhaps reconsider some things. Happy moments tend to be more gentle reminders about how well my life can get at times, but painful moments usually strike hard and sharp, especially the ones I will remember for the rest of my life.

This might sound like I’m taking tough lessons from life and in a way it is; what I’m trying to say is that the main way for us to develop is to go through tougher and more challenging moments. This is because sometimes that’s what it takes to make some people stop and think for a second; me especially.

This thought might sound quite depressing or alarming, but it can be seen as a good thing. In fact, the things that hurt us can be seen as being positive. Without these painful memories, we cannot develop and will probably start taking the happy moments for granted. Although no one wants to suffer, suffering can be seen as a reminder that the happy everyday moments can be taken away at any moment. This has certainly been a reminder for me and has made me cherish even the smallest things that make me happy, because I can never be sure how much more of those moments I will experience.

Therefore, in a way I’m just trying to show that there is light in the darkest moments of our lives, but this mainly applies to those who have more happy than painful moments. This is because I am fortunate enough to not experience the reverse of that, and so I do not know how those people feel about their painful experiences. However, I think that ultimately, it is still the painful memories that can shape us more than the happy moments. Quite rarely is someone too happy with life, but a lot people at some point in their life is dissatisfied with their current situation. I don’t want this to sound like a depressing post, but instead I’m trying to say that painful moments should not be feared so much, but instead be accepted as a way to make us better people and to iron out our flaws.